- Why the Chinese don't smoke?
"Because they are so small and yellow!
Head of the Department included in the study and shouting at staff:
"As I said, during the work it is prohibited to smoke!
The answer comes:
"And who is working?
Who said that Smoking does not affect the voice of the woman? Try sitting on the couch, shake off the ashes on the carpet!
Her kiss was like a SIP of the warm vodka, which rinsed ashtray...
___________________________________________________________________________
The new inscription of the Ministry of health on a pack of cigarettes:
"Smoking will kill you before the world Cup in Russia".
A shame, Yes?
The owner of one of a tobacco shop in San Francisco nervous: its competitor has attracted a lot of buyers, hiring a beautiful Spanish and placing it in the window of a rolling cigars and occasionally throwing playful views to the passing men.
The case had to correct, and then he thought of this: that in a couple of days in the window of his shop was sitting in a bathing suit slender blonde girl, turning cigars, but with his back to the passers-by. His shop was immediately filled with men.
_________________________________________________________________
Doctor - patient:
- If you stop Smoking, you live another 20 years.
"Fine, then I'll throw the years in the 80s.
_________________________________________________________________
HOW TO QUIT SMOKING.
You want to quit Smoking, and You have it you can not do it.
1. Let's say up to this time You have never smoked,
then You will have to do.
Buy a pack of cigarettes and try a cigarette.
2. For example, suppose You all smoke and smoke, and the taste and the smell is felt.
Light the cigarette, the method of presentation to it of the open fire and smoke further.
3. For example, say You cannot be a light for quite a long
time. Remove a cigarette from the pack and stop chasing the pack.
4. For example, suppose You feel unpleasant pain in the mouth
cavity. Turn the cigarette so that her mouth was
its not burning end.
5. For example, say You don't like the taste of cigarettes. Perhaps you smoke filter.
To this did not happen, buy cigarettes without the filter -
Accept or Astra, or at least a "Death under a sail"
the production of friendly Cuba.
6. For example, if You dizzy and tormented by nausea.
Then first drink of vodka, and then smoke. Dizziness and nausea
can be blamed on the alcohol.
7. Let's say, the cigarette do You often go out. To remove a cigarette from his mouth,
when You drink vodka.
8. For example, out of You and the smoke went up. Do not worry, in contrast to vodka and smoke
should behave. ATTENTION!!! Not to be confused, one of You must
the smoke out,
instead of vodka. And yet, to light a new cigarette not necessarily
say the new toast.
9. Suppose that You already like smoke, smoke a year or two,
in order to consolidate the skills acquired.
10. Now throw.
_________________________________________________________________
A drop of nicotine kills the horse, but the hamster is tearing to shreds
A drop of cannabinoid forcing the horse to Chi-Chi, a hamster again tearing to pieces (but already from the sides).
Drop of cocaine reveals the creative potentials of the horse, and the hamster starts humping from their own невъе#of ownership.
A drop of heroin increases the self-horse, and the hamster begins to flatten more from their own невъе#of ownership.
Drop of ketamine provide horse four hours a healthy restful sleep, and hamster raskolbasit for a couple of days.
Drop amphetamine allow the horse to focus, and the hamster will lead to paranoia and окосения.
Drop триптамина provide horse some of the brightest of glitches and easy efforts to отходняке, and the hamster out of his head start to grow horns, flowers and other colorful stuff. Hours to eight.
Drop mescaline dismiss the horse's point of Assembly, and the hamster will turn to the Shai-Hulud. Dwarf
Drop lizergina open horse path in the Matrix, and for the hamster to close the door in the real world...
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Mark TWAIN particularly loved by the people. Why? Yes, because its fun and funny aphorisms, often ill-tempered, clever and witty remarks strike the target on the spot, hit the nail on the head. That's cool and funny, funny aphorism about bad habits, Smoking, and aphorisms and quotes on the subject of health and healthy way of life. Note, mark TWAIN lived for 75 years!
There is nothing easier than to stop Smoking, " I have done it hundreds of times!
The only way to preserve the health - it is something that you do not want, drink what is not love, and do what you don't like...
_____________________________________________________________________________________________
ABOUT THE KOHL-SMOKER
High School Husky Kolya
Smokes under his Fig tree, Smoking in the school,
In the shop and in the movies,
Smokes a lot and a long time ago.
Husky Kohl teased at school,
Because If it
Not the same as the boys.
The people didn't say.
Colin voice changed -
He as under (a view of choking.
Kolya - foolish child
Not in the order of the spleen,
The bronchi, the heart and the liver.
Well, and the lungs Kolya,
As sprinkled with salt,
As with Tina,
draping in (PNU grey spider's web.
Побраните him, or what.
Because this Kolya
Their health persecutor.
Threatens Kolya cancer
Or atherosclerosis -
Also not a bunch of roses:
Become brittle blood vessels
And harassed by colds,
And quite weakened sight -
See what does he starts.
To live long on the light,
Don't reach for a cigarette!
___________________________________________________________________________________________
How to quit Smoking. (Folk remedy).
Tested by me personally, works like a clock. But, in order.
When I was 13-14 years old my dad smoked like a chimney.
Well, mom, of course, was not in delight - all the house of stank, Drapes
yellow, and etc.
Once I heard that if настричь nails with legs and shove in
in cigarettes, the man immediately quit Smoking.
Said - done. Arm yourself with nails, slowly loaded a few cigarettes
in the bundle on the table. Sitting, waiting.
Dad took the cigarette, lit it... Such expressions I never
in the ever seen! Fell, like a monkey, white and expressed the highest
the degree of surprise. For a long time he vomit and cough, and after proceeded to an analysis of the
the flight.
And the smoke he once this cast!
"Because they are so small and yellow!
Head of the Department included in the study and shouting at staff:
"As I said, during the work it is prohibited to smoke!
The answer comes:
"And who is working?
Who said that Smoking does not affect the voice of the woman? Try sitting on the couch, shake off the ashes on the carpet!
Her kiss was like a SIP of the warm vodka, which rinsed ashtray...
___________________________________________________________________________
The new inscription of the Ministry of health on a pack of cigarettes:
"Smoking will kill you before the world Cup in Russia".
A shame, Yes?
The owner of one of a tobacco shop in San Francisco nervous: its competitor has attracted a lot of buyers, hiring a beautiful Spanish and placing it in the window of a rolling cigars and occasionally throwing playful views to the passing men.
The case had to correct, and then he thought of this: that in a couple of days in the window of his shop was sitting in a bathing suit slender blonde girl, turning cigars, but with his back to the passers-by. His shop was immediately filled with men.
_________________________________________________________________
Doctor - patient:
- If you stop Smoking, you live another 20 years.
"Fine, then I'll throw the years in the 80s.
_________________________________________________________________
HOW TO QUIT SMOKING.
You want to quit Smoking, and You have it you can not do it.
1. Let's say up to this time You have never smoked,
then You will have to do.
Buy a pack of cigarettes and try a cigarette.
2. For example, suppose You all smoke and smoke, and the taste and the smell is felt.
Light the cigarette, the method of presentation to it of the open fire and smoke further.
3. For example, say You cannot be a light for quite a long
time. Remove a cigarette from the pack and stop chasing the pack.
4. For example, suppose You feel unpleasant pain in the mouth
cavity. Turn the cigarette so that her mouth was
its not burning end.
5. For example, say You don't like the taste of cigarettes. Perhaps you smoke filter.
To this did not happen, buy cigarettes without the filter -
Accept or Astra, or at least a "Death under a sail"
the production of friendly Cuba.
6. For example, if You dizzy and tormented by nausea.
Then first drink of vodka, and then smoke. Dizziness and nausea
can be blamed on the alcohol.
7. Let's say, the cigarette do You often go out. To remove a cigarette from his mouth,
when You drink vodka.
8. For example, out of You and the smoke went up. Do not worry, in contrast to vodka and smoke
should behave. ATTENTION!!! Not to be confused, one of You must
the smoke out,
instead of vodka. And yet, to light a new cigarette not necessarily
say the new toast.
9. Suppose that You already like smoke, smoke a year or two,
in order to consolidate the skills acquired.
10. Now throw.
_________________________________________________________________
A drop of nicotine kills the horse, but the hamster is tearing to shreds
A drop of cannabinoid forcing the horse to Chi-Chi, a hamster again tearing to pieces (but already from the sides).
Drop of cocaine reveals the creative potentials of the horse, and the hamster starts humping from their own невъе#of ownership.
A drop of heroin increases the self-horse, and the hamster begins to flatten more from their own невъе#of ownership.
Drop of ketamine provide horse four hours a healthy restful sleep, and hamster raskolbasit for a couple of days.
Drop amphetamine allow the horse to focus, and the hamster will lead to paranoia and окосения.
Drop триптамина provide horse some of the brightest of glitches and easy efforts to отходняке, and the hamster out of his head start to grow horns, flowers and other colorful stuff. Hours to eight.
Drop mescaline dismiss the horse's point of Assembly, and the hamster will turn to the Shai-Hulud. Dwarf
Drop lizergina open horse path in the Matrix, and for the hamster to close the door in the real world...
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Mark TWAIN particularly loved by the people. Why? Yes, because its fun and funny aphorisms, often ill-tempered, clever and witty remarks strike the target on the spot, hit the nail on the head. That's cool and funny, funny aphorism about bad habits, Smoking, and aphorisms and quotes on the subject of health and healthy way of life. Note, mark TWAIN lived for 75 years!
There is nothing easier than to stop Smoking, " I have done it hundreds of times!
The only way to preserve the health - it is something that you do not want, drink what is not love, and do what you don't like...
_____________________________________________________________________________________________
ABOUT THE KOHL-SMOKER
High School Husky Kolya
Smokes under his Fig tree, Smoking in the school,
In the shop and in the movies,
Smokes a lot and a long time ago.
Husky Kohl teased at school,
Because If it
Not the same as the boys.
The people didn't say.
Colin voice changed -
He as under (a view of choking.
Kolya - foolish child
Not in the order of the spleen,
The bronchi, the heart and the liver.
Well, and the lungs Kolya,
As sprinkled with salt,
As with Tina,
draping in (PNU grey spider's web.
Побраните him, or what.
Because this Kolya
Their health persecutor.
Threatens Kolya cancer
Or atherosclerosis -
Also not a bunch of roses:
Become brittle blood vessels
And harassed by colds,
And quite weakened sight -
See what does he starts.
To live long on the light,
Don't reach for a cigarette!
___________________________________________________________________________________________
How to quit Smoking. (Folk remedy).
Tested by me personally, works like a clock. But, in order.
When I was 13-14 years old my dad smoked like a chimney.
Well, mom, of course, was not in delight - all the house of stank, Drapes
yellow, and etc.
Once I heard that if настричь nails with legs and shove in
in cigarettes, the man immediately quit Smoking.
Said - done. Arm yourself with nails, slowly loaded a few cigarettes
in the bundle on the table. Sitting, waiting.
Dad took the cigarette, lit it... Such expressions I never
in the ever seen! Fell, like a monkey, white and expressed the highest
the degree of surprise. For a long time he vomit and cough, and after proceeded to an analysis of the
the flight.
And the smoke he once this cast!
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